What's On in Newcastle in July


The Saturday Show

Saturday 1st July 2017


19:00


20:30



More Info & Book Tickets Quick Info

The Saturday Show

Saturday 1st July 2017

It’s the biggest show of the week. Relax as our resident comperes lead the way with The Saturday Show. Featuring five different acts on each bill there’s something for everyone to laugh at including the very best comics from the UK and beyond. Hot food available in the club or arrive a bit earlier to try our fab pre-theatre menu in the upstairs bistro.
Please note we require a payment in advance for Saturday evenings, there is a 50p surcharge per ticket for all card payments.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With Jarred Christmas , Felicity Ward and host Steffen Peddie .


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Sod The Tories (And Have A Nice Week)

Sunday 2nd July 2017


19:00


20:30



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Sod The Tories (And Have A Nice Week)

Sunday 2nd July 2017

Fed up with the government? Fed up with the establishment? Fed up with what gets passed off as modern entertainment?
Then come be lifted by the Sod The Tories. A night of comedy, music, spoken word and general anti-authoritarian shenanigans. We’re not saying you’re an idiot if you like all the things mentioned above, but the people that are behind them think you’re a f**king moron. We don’t. We respect your right to have your intellect stimulated.
Or you can remain bewildered with the herd. That’s how they want you. Things are changing…
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran

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Carl Hutchinson LIVE

Monday 3rd July 2017


19:00


20:30



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Carl Hutchinson LIVE

Monday 3rd July 2017

Multi-award winning and one of the UK’s most in-demand comedians today, Carl is sure to put on a great night of comedy as he always does.






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Red Raw

Wednesday 5th July 2017


19:00


20:30



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Red Raw

Wednesday 5th July 2017

This weekly showcase for beginners lets the newest comedians in the Northeast try out their material in front of a live audience for the first time. It features up to ten new acts and gives you the chance to see the stars of tomorrow today. Many established comedians also drop by from time to time to test out their latest gags.
Please note:
We can no longer take reservations for this show without a pre-payment.
You can still book and pay online OR you can purchase tickets on the door from 7pm.
We hold back 150 tickets for sale at the venue door on the door on the night – please note that due to massive demand, tickets sold on the door are limited to one per customer.
It’s advisable to be there for doors opening as this show regularly sells out!
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran

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The Thursday Show

Thursday 6th July 2017


19:00


20:30



More Info & Book Tickets Quick Info

The Thursday Show

Thursday 6th July 2017

Start the weekend early with this two hour live comedy show. It features the best comperes, established headliners and several up and coming acts from the local and national circuits. There’s also a slot for a newcomer on every bill. The line-up is also usually the same as our premium Saturday night show but at almost half the price.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With Joe Rooney , Will Franken and host JoJo Sutherland .



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The Friday Show

Friday 7th July 2017


19:00


21:00



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The Friday Show

Friday 7th July 2017

There’s no better way to end the working week than with The Friday Show. Our ace comperes, seasoned headliners and roster of up and coming home grown comedians combine in this two hour live show. There’s five acts on every bill including the very best comics from the UK and beyond.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With Joe Rooney , Will Franken and host JoJo Sutherland .


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The Saturday Show

Saturday 8th July 2017


19:00


20:30



More Info & Book Tickets Quick Info

The Saturday Show

Saturday 8th July 2017

It’s the biggest show of the week. Relax as our resident comperes lead the way with The Saturday Show. Featuring five different acts on each bill there’s something for everyone to laugh at including the very best comics from the UK and beyond. Hot food available in the club or arrive a bit earlier to try our fab pre-theatre menu in the upstairs bistro.
Please note we require a payment in advance for Saturday evenings, there is a 50p surcharge per ticket for all card payments.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With Joe Rooney , Will Franken and host JoJo Sutherland .


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Good Grief

Monday 10th July 2017


19:00


20:30



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Good Grief

Monday 10th July 2017

Dear Sir/Madam
Good Grief is here! Join us for an evening of comedy from emerging talent and our closest comedy affiliate. We take our comedy fresh and tasty so we're keeping the doors low and the quality high. Expect some stellar acts to drop into the North East for this. Four top acts, one experienced compere and a cracking headliner for 3 diddly squid - lovely stuff!
Yours with a ton of love and really properly decent hand shake.
Good Grief
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran

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Red Raw

Wednesday 12th July 2017


19:00


20:30



More Info & Book Tickets Quick Info

Red Raw

Wednesday 12th July 2017

This weekly showcase for beginners lets the newest comedians in the Northeast try out their material in front of a live audience for the first time. It features up to ten new acts and gives you the chance to see the stars of tomorrow today. Many established comedians also drop by from time to time to test out their latest gags.
Please note:
We can no longer take reservations for this show without a pre-payment.
You can still book and pay online OR you can purchase tickets on the door from 7pm.
We hold back 150 tickets for sale at the venue door on the door on the night – please note that due to massive demand, tickets sold on the door are limited to one per customer.
It’s advisable to be there for doors opening as this show regularly sells out!
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With headliner Archie Maddocks .

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The Thursday Show

Thursday 13th July 2017


19:00


20:30



More Info & Book Tickets Quick Info

The Thursday Show

Thursday 13th July 2017

Start the weekend early with this two hour live comedy show. It features the best comperes, established headliners and several up and coming acts from the local and national circuits. There’s also a slot for a newcomer on every bill. The line-up is also usually the same as our premium Saturday night show but at almost half the price.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With Gavin Webster , Dana Alexander , Archie Maddocks and host Martin Mor .


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The Friday Show

Friday 14th July 2017


19:00


21:00



More Info & Book Tickets Quick Info

The Friday Show

Friday 14th July 2017

There’s no better way to end the working week than with The Friday Show. Our ace comperes, seasoned headliners and roster of up and coming home grown comedians combine in this two hour live show. There’s five acts on every bill including the very best comics from the UK and beyond.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With Gavin Webster , Dana Alexander , Archie Maddocks and host Martin Mor .


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The Saturday Show

Saturday 15th July 2017


19:00


20:30



More Info & Book Tickets Quick Info

The Saturday Show

Saturday 15th July 2017

It’s the biggest show of the week. Relax as our resident comperes lead the way with The Saturday Show. Featuring five different acts on each bill there’s something for everyone to laugh at including the very best comics from the UK and beyond. Hot food available in the club or arrive a bit earlier to try our fab pre-theatre menu in the upstairs bistro.
Please note we require a payment in advance for Saturday evenings, there is a 50p surcharge per ticket for all card payments.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With Gavin Webster , Dana Alexander , Archie Maddocks and host Martin Mor .


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Kids Comedy Club

Sunday 16th July 2017


12:00


12:30



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Kids Comedy Club

Sunday 16th July 2017

Kids, do you like watching idiots making fools of themselves?
Parents, sick of the kids staring at screens all day but can't really be bothered to entertain them yourself?
Well, why not come to the Kid's Comedy Club? There's loads of daft stuff going on, there are always a selection of the finest comedians around doing jokes without swears, sometimes there is magic, sometimes improv, sometimes impressions but it is NEVER boring..This show is suitable for children and adults of all ages, (well maybe not babies or really, grumpy old folk). Best suited for 8 to 12 year olds.
Tickets £4 per person.
You can also purchase meals from the kids menu only £4 which we’ll bring to you during the interval - we will keep it healthy, kid friendly and of course we can cater for the fussiest of eaters!
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
Approx running time 1hr 30 mins

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Seymour Mace Makes It Up As He Goes Along

Sunday 16th July 2017


19:00


20:30



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Seymour Mace Makes It Up As He Goes Along

Sunday 16th July 2017

Seymour Mace makes it up as he goes along. Come and join Seymour and any of his mates he can con into working for nothing as they make stuff up on the spot relying only on the fact that they're funny.
It could turn out to be anything from a regular stand up night to an impromptu scripted performance of the film 'Zulu Dawn'.
So; y'know, you should come down, or not, whatever you like really, I'm not trying to twist your arm but, if you fancy it it'd be nice to see you.
There, I said it. Happy now?



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Benefit in Aid of The Percy Hedley Foundation

Monday 17th July 2017


19:00


20:30



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Benefit in Aid of The Percy Hedley Foundation

Monday 17th July 2017

The Percy Hedley Foundation is a charity that plays a crucial role in the lives of disabled children, young people, adults and their families throughout the North East and beyond. They provide a range of specialist education services, a wide variety of day services for adults, a sports academy, an employability service and residential services for children and adults.
Join us for a night of stellar comedy to raise funds for their valuable work. We have a fully accessible venue, take a tour here !
With five great acts TBC!
To ensure the maximum amount of money reaches Percy Hedley, we are not taking advance payments for this show. Tickets are £5 and can be reserved by calling our Box Office on 0191 300 9700 . We are always happy to offer a complimentary carers ticket to any of our shows.
@percyhedley
https://www.facebook.com/percy.hedley/


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Bright Club

Tuesday 18th July 2017


19:00


20:30



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Bright Club

Tuesday 18th July 2017

Bright Club Newcastle is the thinking person's stand up night, blending comedy, music, new writing, research and, performance, into a smorgasbord of delights. Locally sourced Academics from the North East take to the stage performing comic routines centred around their research. Funny and fascinating in equal measure, Bright Club offers a night out unlike any other.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran

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Red Raw

Wednesday 19th July 2017


19:00


20:30



More Info & Book Tickets Quick Info

Red Raw

Wednesday 19th July 2017

This weekly showcase for beginners lets the newest comedians in the Northeast try out their material in front of a live audience for the first time. It features up to ten new acts and gives you the chance to see the stars of tomorrow today. Many established comedians also drop by from time to time to test out their latest gags.
Please note:
We can no longer take reservations for this show without a pre-payment.
You can still book and pay online OR you can purchase tickets on the door from 7pm.
We hold back 150 tickets for sale at the venue door on the door on the night – please note that due to massive demand, tickets sold on the door are limited to one per customer.
It’s advisable to be there for doors opening as this show regularly sells out!
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With host Lee Kyle .

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The Suggestibles

Thursday 20th July 2017


19:30


20:30



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The Suggestibles

Thursday 20th July 2017

Bright Club Newcastle is the thinking person's stand up night, blending comedy, music, new writing, research and, performance, into a smorgasbord of delights. Locally sourced Academics from the North East take to the stage performing comic routines centred around their research. Funny and fascinating in equal measure, Bright Club offers a night out unlike any other.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran

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The Friday Show

Friday 21st July 2017


19:00


20:30



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The Friday Show

Friday 21st July 2017

There’s no better way to end the working week than with The Friday Show. Our ace comperes, seasoned headliners and roster of up and coming home grown comedians combine in this two hour live show. There’s five acts on every bill including the very best comics from the UK and beyond.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With The Reverend Obadiah Steppenwolfe III , Matt Green , Chris Henry , Sammy Dobson and host Matt Reed .



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Balloonatics

Saturday 22nd July 2017


12:00


12:30



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Balloonatics

Saturday 22nd July 2017

£20 FAMILY TICKET (FOUR TICKETS - AT LEAST ONE ADULT REQUIRED) AVAILABLE BY CALLING THE BOX OFFICE ON 0141 212 3389
Get ready to go balloon crazy! Scottish comedian Chris Henry brings his hit children’s show to The Stand as part of his world tour.
A show the whole family will love, Balloonatics promises to be a chaos filled, nonesense-packed hour of balloons, laughs and excitement, with never a dull moment for anyone!
Everyone is invited to join in and become part of the Balloonatics Army, where it doesn’t matter how good you are, as long as you’re having fun!
This is a unique children’s show which promises to keep everyone entertained, and never stoops to be patronising or boring.
Chris Henry is an award-nominated comedian who has toured the world and headlined all over the UK. After getting rave reviews at the Edinburgh Fringe in 2016, Balloonatics will be returning from 3 months at the Australian festivals as well a tour of Asia. A show for young and old alike – whatever your age you’re bound to have a blast ballooning around with Chris. A show guaranteed to go with a BANG!
'pitched perfectly' Children’s Choice Awards
'Raucous fun for kids and plenty of gags for the parents' Fringereview
'undeniably entertaining' ★ ★ ★ ★ Broadway Baby
'energetic and friendly' Adelaide Advertiser

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The Saturday Show

Saturday 22nd July 2017


19:00


20:30



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The Saturday Show

Saturday 22nd July 2017

It’s the biggest show of the week. Relax as our resident comperes lead the way with The Saturday Show. Featuring five different acts on each bill there’s something for everyone to laugh at including the very best comics from the UK and beyond. Hot food available in the club or arrive a bit earlier to try our fab pre-theatre menu in the upstairs bistro.
Please note we require a payment in advance for Saturday evenings, there is a 50p surcharge per ticket for all card payments.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With The Reverend Obadiah Steppenwolfe III , Matt Green , Chris Henry , Sammy Dobson and host Matt Reed .


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Simon Donald: SATISCRAPTORY

Sunday 23rd July 2017


19:00


20:30



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Simon Donald: SATISCRAPTORY

Sunday 23rd July 2017

SATISCRAPTORY: Descriptive of something of a poor, but adequate standard, eg. BBC local radio, McDonald’s food.
Simon Donald , one of the Donald brothers of Viz Comic infamy (the ‘Knob joke Gallaghers of Tyneside) brings home his show reflecting on his twelve years on the road as a stand-up comedian.
‘former Viz man, as funny with a microphone in his hand as he was with a pencil’ Guardian
‘Superb inventive comedy' Stage
'Cerebral filth' List
'Gloriously improper' Skinny



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Steffen Peddie's Chat Show Thing*

Monday 24th July 2017


19:00


20:00



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Steffen Peddie's Chat Show Thing*

Monday 24th July 2017

It’s a chat show, live with no cameras and no censor. What do we discuss? Who knows! Your host Steffen Peddie will welcome you to pull up a chair and listen to the backstage chat that the audience do not get to hear. With live stand up and chat from the guests and the chance to put forward questions yourself and maybe win a prize from the “Table of Tat” Why would you not want to be there?
*may feature jokes and lots of ad libbing.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014 and 2015
#StandUpScran

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THE FOOTBAAAALL SHOW

Tuesday 25th July 2017


19:00


20:30



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THE FOOTBAAAALL SHOW

Tuesday 25th July 2017

Join Gavin Webster and Lee Kyle for the only topical north east football comedy show. Expect local lampooning of the regions clubs, great football nostalgia and anecdotes, a quiz where you can challenge the lads for money on their historical knowledge of Newcastle United, pies and bovril in the break, even a sing song at the end. With great guests including a couple of ex footballing legends. Howay the lads (and lasses)!
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran



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Red Raw

Wednesday 26th July 2017


19:00


20:30



More Info & Book Tickets Quick Info

Red Raw

Wednesday 26th July 2017

This weekly showcase for beginners lets the newest comedians in the Northeast try out their material in front of a live audience for the first time. It features up to ten new acts and gives you the chance to see the stars of tomorrow today. Many established comedians also drop by from time to time to test out their latest gags.
Please note:
We can no longer take reservations for this show without a pre-payment.
You can still book and pay online OR you can purchase tickets on the door from 7pm.
We hold back 150 tickets for sale at the venue door on the door on the night – please note that due to massive demand, tickets sold on the door are limited to one per customer.
It’s advisable to be there for doors opening as this show regularly sells out!
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With host Hal Branson and headliner Lauren Pattison .

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The Thursday Show

Thursday 27th July 2017


19:00


20:30



More Info & Book Tickets Quick Info

The Thursday Show

Thursday 27th July 2017

Start the weekend early with this two hour live comedy show. It features the best comperes, established headliners and several up and coming acts from the local and national circuits. There’s also a slot for a newcomer on every bill. The line-up is also usually the same as our premium Saturday night show but at almost half the price.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With Glenn Wool , Jimmy McGhie , Lauren Pattison and host Susie McCabe .


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The Friday Show

Friday 28th July 2017


19:00


20:30



More Info & Book Tickets Quick Info

The Friday Show

Friday 28th July 2017

There’s no better way to end the working week than with The Friday Show. Our ace comperes, seasoned headliners and roster of up and coming home grown comedians combine in this two hour live show. There’s five acts on every bill including the very best comics from the UK and beyond.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With Glenn Wool , Jimmy McGhie , Lauren Pattison and host Susie McCabe .


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The Saturday Show

Saturday 29th July 2017


19:00


20:30



More Info & Book Tickets Quick Info

The Saturday Show

Saturday 29th July 2017

It’s the biggest show of the week. Relax as our resident comperes lead the way with The Saturday Show. Featuring five different acts on each bill there’s something for everyone to laugh at including the very best comics from the UK and beyond. Hot food available in the club or arrive a bit earlier to try our fab pre-theatre menu in the upstairs bistro.
Please note we require a payment in advance for Saturday evenings, there is a 50p surcharge per ticket for all card payments.
Hot food available in the club or why not treat yourself to some pre-show dining at The Stand Bistro open Mon/Tues from 5pm (show nights only), Wed-Sat from 11am and noon on Sundays.
Tripadvisor Excellence Award Winner 2014, 2015 and 2016
#StandUpScran
With Glenn Wool , Jimmy McGhie , Lauren Pattison and host Susie McCabe .


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Lauren Pattison: Work In Progress

Sunday 30th July 2017


17:00


17:30



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Lauren Pattison: Work In Progress

Sunday 30th July 2017

One of the brightest young things on the comedy scene, who is beginning to make her presence known across the country, homegrown talent Lauren Pattison brings a preview of her hotly anticipated debut hour to the club she's grown up (and thrown up) in.
Fresh from performing at both Leeds and Latitude Festival and supporting the likes of Katherine Ryan, Kerry Godliman and Dane Baptiste on tour, this baby faced comic is one to watch out for.
'star of the future ... Lauren Pattison looks set for fame' List
'sharp writing' Guardian
'rising star' Evening Standard
'You. Are. So. Funny.' Katherine Ryan
'poignancy and sheer belligerent coarseness ... a riot' York Press
'psychologically devious' Clive Anderson




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